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"Are you really looking to have a reason for NOT being happy or successful?"
"The ref blew the call!"
"Politicians lied!"
"My parents never helped out."
"That guy totally cut me off."
Odds are, if you have ever uttered one of those phrases - or any other type of "justification" - it is because you are explaining why things didn't work out.
We LOVE justification for our failures - and I am just as guilty as anyone. A few weeks ago I talked about how your ego is a dream killer. Well, your ego loves justification - they are best friends.
Ego & Justification = BFF (Okay, only the teens got that one - OMG)
Here's the thing about justification, and why it is so dangerous - it's because you might actually be RIGHT sometimes! We really may have gotten rooked on that bad call. Our parents really may have held us back (not you, mom and dad :-)), politicians have been known to lie, and that guy really is a clueless driver.
See - you have every reason to be upset - and you will probably find others to support you and throw fuel on the fire.
But, when it is all said and done...
WHO CARES?
Are you really looking to have a reason for NOT being happy or successful - or would you rather dust yourself off and get back at it? Because, if you need an excuse - you will always find something. It is a lot harder to keep taking punches and continue to keep coming back.
WHAT ARE YOUR OPTIONS?
You either live an unfulfilled life surrounded by the justification of why you couldn't do or be the person you wanted to be. Or, you keep plugging away, you keep scrapping and adapting - not taking failure or unfairness as a cop-out - but just another hurdle to get around.
Don't tell me why it didn't work out. Tell me what you learned from it and are now doing better!
I can run down a list of ego driven justifications of why I haven't achieved certain goals - but none of them make me feel good when I go to sleep at night. As Jack Canfield of the Chicken Soup for the Soul series explains it, "They all amount to a bunch of 'So what!"
So what are you doing about the obstacles preventing you from being and doing the things you want to do?
In my favorite "spiritual slap in the face book," Science and Health , Mary Baker Eddy says it this way: "The devotion of thought to an honest achievement makes the achievement possible. Exceptions only confirm this rule, proving that failure is occasioned by a too feeble faith."
"Too feeble faith." Ouch. Not me.
If you have been wronged, I really am sorry - but now what? Or, like Jack Canfield would say, "So what?" Join the club!
If justification is your worst friend - then let's hope we can all work on seeing that we are NEVER justified for giving in on our purpose and passions.
If you are needing your own "spiritual slap in the face" - give me a call :-)
Read more from this blogger at Direct Life Coaching .
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