Home  Spirit/Ethics What you "see" is what you get!
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What you "see" is what you get! |
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By Travis Thomas
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Starting from perfection is better than trying for correction of our views.
Have you ever gone into a meeting with people you just knew were going to be hard to work with - and they were. See, you were right!
Have you ever gone home for a family holiday assuming everyone was going to treat you the way they did when you were a kid - and they did. See, you were right!
Have you ever gotten your car worked on and you just knew they were going to sock it to you - and they did. Man, right again!
Have you ever thought really poorly about someone - and then were pleasantly surprised when they completely overachieved your expectations?
Hmmm...probably not too much?
Why is that?
Is it possible...that what we actually "see" in people is exactly what they give us back?
You expect your boss to be inflexible - so he is!
You expect your spouse to be impatient - so she is!
You expect the teens in your neighborhood to be "up to no good" - and they are!
So my question is - what are you choosing to see in your fellow man?
Chances are - that is exactly what you are "seeing" in return.
Have you ever got up in the morning feeling awful - and you start telling yourself how awful you feel - and whenever someone asks how you feel - you say awful. And the more you think about how awful you feel - the more awful you feel - and you are constantly reminding people how awful you feel - yet you can't understand why you feel so awful...
Hmmmm...
Try this! Wherever you are, for the rest of the day go into each interaction, whether with someone you know or a stranger, and "see" that person as kind, understanding, and helpful. Expect it. Even before the interaction begins - just expect that person expresses all of those qualities - and feel free to add on more qualities like patience, joy, intelligence (you name it).
Then, at the end of the day - take a look back and think about your interactions. How were they?
For the past few weeks I have been going through my day "seeing" the best in people - long before I even get to them. I am trying this at home - with my work - and every store I go into. Sometimes I have been better than others - but I am much more conscious of how I am "seeing" my fellow man.
I can honestly say - the results are great!
Why shouldn't I be seeing my fellow man this way? I see myself as expressing all of those qualities I listed - so why would I assume they don't express them as well? Isn't that a bit egotistical of me to see myself as superior to my fellow man? Do I not think that there is goodness at the core of people?
Yeah I do.
Growing up I was always spiritually taught to see the perfection in man by beholding the perfect man. I can honestly say I have tried to do this to the best of my ability - but after taking a quick quiz a few weeks ago - I realized that I wasn't seeing my fellow man as perfect from the start. Instead, once I saw something I didn't like in someone - I would then "behold the perfect man." To me this is a backward approach. So now instead of waiting for man to underachieve and then needing to correct my view of that person I am starting from the onset with the perfect man - and expecting perfection in return.
This does not mean I am naive, or will allow myself to get walked on. It just means that no matter how people decide to "be" in their life I am going to start off by "seeing" them as perfect. And if it is anything less than perfection they are expressing, I will still "see" them in a better light - but do the best I can to deal with the current reality.
Hey, I am not sure how you all will respond to this blog - but I am expecting you will like it ;) Read more from this blogger at Direct Life Coaching .
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