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Re: tasteless comments - 2006/08/25 00:35 Hey everyone...thought I would chime in

As a guy...and as a guy who enjoys humor, I have probably been in situations where joking around may have started out innocent enough...but different people can take jokes to different levels.

Trust me, the culprit is often one or two guys...but peer pressure being the way it is...some of the other guys may just be laughing because they feel they are supposed to.

I appreciate all of the ideas thus far, but I also see some value in a practical step or two. I have been working recently on not taking things personally...even when they seem that way. This sitaution sounds like an example of someone crossing a line they shouldn't be crossing...and they might not know it. Now, it is not a matter of whether they should know it or not, but they probably don't.

Being all prayed up...you could always confront the main culprit...and in a non-defensive and impersonal way let them know that comments make you feel uncomfortable...and that other women feel the same way. I would be really surprised if this didn't nip it in the bud.

Or, talk to one of the guys in the group you are more comfortable with...and maybe then he can put the gentle squash on the comments.

Either way, I would remind you to impersonalize the comments...and then know like Sew said earlier, that there is one Father...one Mind in control...so that frees up any fear of confronting the individual.

I hope that helps

Travis

Post edited by: mtosto, at: 2006/08/25 12:35
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Re:tasteless comments - 2006/08/25 18:22 Your dilemma trains the spotlight on one of the greatest challenges we face in our society as well as our workplaces: lack of respect. Respect shows that we acknowledge and honor the God-presence or soul within every living being and the divine purpose of every inanimate object. It is the basicfoundation of a spiritual life and of spirit-infused relationships.

It is your right to be respected, but it also is your responsibility to address the issue in a respectful manner. So you might say something like the following: "I know that you gentlemen respect me; you demonstrate it in many ways in our professional collaboration. Might I ask that you demonstrate it even more by refraining from off-color comments in my presence?"

Perhaps some of our others readers might have additional thoughts or suggestions.
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Re: tasteless comments - 2006/08/29 18:04 wow, that's hugely helpful, thanks Travis. I've thought about talking to some of the other guys on the QT but hadn't yet. that may be my next best step.
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Re:tasteless comments - 2006/08/29 18:06 oh, man, David, that too is very helpful! and it's reminding me that I really do love these guys, many of them are my friends, and I know that they do actually respect me as a businessperson and as a peer.

all the ideas have been great!! thanks!! I'll let you know how our meetings go in the coming weeks. maybe even thinking/praying about this has helped solve the problem!
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